I don’t know what to say

I leave my home in seven days. I have a backpack and a vague semblance of a plan. I have hopes and expectations for my voyage but when I’m asked about what I hope to get out of this experience, or why I wanted to go in the first place, 

I don’t know what to say.

My country feels like it’s falling apart more quickly with each passing week and the hatred and exhaustion and violence begets more hatred and violence and exhaustion, causing the loss of too many lives. My heart breaks for my fellow humankind, and I know that I will never truly understand how it feels to be persecuted but that doesn’t mean I wish to stand idly by whilst others fear for their lives every day. I’m not a fighter, but if someone – anyone – needs help, I want to be there for them and make my voice heard, but 

I don’t know what to say.

I want to write, I want to pour my heart out through my fingertips and write until there are no words left, not just in me but also in the English language. I want to write for months, years on end but

I don’t know what to say. 

I don’t know what to say.


6 thoughts on “I don’t know what to say

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      1. Yes, silence speaks too. And… Who asks what you hope to get out of a trip? That’s kinda… rude… And if you need a comeback if it happens again tell them you are on a very important research mission to determine the best things to do for your friend and her friend who have always said they are going to go when the year they turn 40. I think going somewhere expecting to get something specific out of the experience can tunnel vision a person out of all sorts of other thoughts/feels/experiences that are out there. Don’t let the people get you down.

        (And when the world is too big and mean and out of control and I can’t give the world a snack to make them all less grumpy and tell them to play nice I try and remember that even though it hardly ever feels like it making my tiny corner of the earth better does make a difference, a little difference, but you know… tiny matches, and little smiles, they add up.<3 )

        Liked by 1 person

      2. A very important research mission, indeed! Should I invest in some spy glasses as well? … I might do that anyway.
        Avoiding tunnel vision is precisely why I planned – or rather, didn’t plan – my trip the way I did. I don’t want to be so focused on experiencing everything that I forget to actually EXPERIENCE everything.
        #AllTheLittleLights ❤

        Liked by 1 person

  1. Indeed, not knowing what to say is the best way to start an adventure. I’m eagerly waiting to see what you have to say after….and if it’s not much that’s perfect too. oxoxoxo I hope you are as in love with your mission in life as I am for you! I can’t say I’ve been more excited about anything I’ve ever done as I am for you…Go get ’em precious!


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